|Ye olde school ranten...
||[Jun. 2nd, 2006|02:40 pm]
Sorry I've neglected you my pretties, I have truly missed you oh so very much.|
Right now I am at a weird fuckin' place in my life, I am so fuckin' bored but I am too lazy to do shit aboot it. I just want to go away. I want my own place and so I can sit and do the shit I wanna do all day and not turn into a different person when other people come home.
I wanna go to Ireland. I've never been off North America in my life and I wanna go see Europe. I've been checking out prices for aeroplanes and hostels and food. I've been trying to create a budget. I think I'd have enough with meinen tax return, but that is all I'd be able to do. I'd have no more "emergency moneys" just in case at some point the proverbial shit hits the fanny fan, I'd be figgity fuct. But just the romantic thought of going to another country all by myself and sleeping in Hostels, eating sam'miches in pubs. Well my brain kinda releases the dolphins if you follow me...
Then schools gonna be done here soon too, and that has me filled will all sorts of fuckin' fear. I don't wanna grow up just yet. I wanna learn more! I wanna go to school to be a radio DJ and I wanna to go to school to get a PhD. in biology! I wanna be a Doctor! I wanna to learn everything before I become an adult. I don't wanna work for no one but myself, doing the shit I love! Being able to say, "hey there I think today is a smashing day to go to Ireland." and then just get up and go! And come home to make a movie, do my radio show and then do experiments with some animals to see what I can do to help them live longer. Especially dogs. I'd give up a life of happiness with a wife if I could have a dog that could live for 80 years. Then I'd help some kids that are in desperate need of help.
I don't wanna go look for a freakin' job. I don't wanna get up at 5:00 in the fuckin' morning. I don't wanna slave away the next 10 years of my life at another place that doesn't treat me right or any of the other employees. I can't take that for the rest of my life, this monotonous, ending rat race. I just want to be able to do what I wanna to do. And answer to no one but myself. Yeah I got up to get more coffee and I lost my momentum that I started this post with.
I can also bitch at the fact that even though I stopped drinking everyday I haven't lost any weight at all. I missed bein' sexy.